Blevinicus: Work and Eat

In my two glorious days off this weekend following a three-day NCAA Track meet I had the pleasure (haha) of hosting, I went back and rewatched the TV show Spartacus: Blood and Sand. While the quality of several of the scenes is laughable I am entrenched in the plot lines of the show. Granted it is a show filled mostly of blood and nudity which is not normally my cup of tea. However, it contains so much more than that built in the storylines of the characters. To those who have not seen it, it is about a man who goes off to fight a war in conjunction with the Romans and after some betrayel from the Romans and some killing of the Roman army he has his wife taken away and he is sold as a slave to a place that trains gladiators.

It is one of those shows that you get so involved with you start picturing yourself as a part of the show, going through what ifs in your head. When I am done thinking about how poor of a gladiator I would be, I begin to carry forth the premis of the show to my own life.

This show would be called Blevinicus: Work and Eat. Whereas all the gladiator show contains is blood and sand (and nudity) for the most part, my show (or life) pretty much contains work and eat. There may be a little bit of sleep mixed in there but even that is rare. Spartacus' entire being was driven by his one true love, Sura. He would give anything including his life to be with her for eternity. I have no equal to this as I have not found the lady to strike me this way. I picture the day when such love exists and I have one to call my own. For now the thing that drives me the most is getting to a day off. I fight through the weeks on end of consecutive work only to taste the sweetness of one day where I am not called, emailed or texted about work. These days are so uncommon that when they do come I struggle to think of how to spend them and end up watching 20 some hours of a gladiator TV show. These days off are my Sura or if you compare it to Braveheart, my freedom. Spartacus got through most days thinking of the time he would be with his wife again. I get through most days thinking of lunch and getting out of the office to go eat.

In the TV show, the gladiators fight in the arena, some for fame and money, others to stay alive and gain their freedom. I fight the battles of hosting events and dealing with others. In my job there is a lot we can't control. We have no control over the outcome of an event and often have to wait on others constantly to get what we need done. I would say for something that takes 10 minutes I usually wait an hour's time. There is no fame or money in our job no matter how much we dream of it so I guess that leaves me just trying to stay alive and gain the freedom of one day off every couple of months.

Some of my favorite movies are the ones where there is a very well-though out plan. This is one of the reasons why the A-Team was such a great show. Every episode included a plan to carry out to save somebody and destroy the bad guy. And like Hannibal Smith, I love it when a plan comes together. Spartacus had a couple of genious plans to kill everybody and escape slavery. I like to think that I would have the capability to come up with such a plan and maybe one day I could write for movies doing just such a think. The Oceans 11, 12 and 13 movies all had great plans as did the Thomas Crown Affair. I plan in my head all the time ways that I can enjoy my day off but I always fail to execute and end up on my couch watching movies.

I am not really sure if any of this makes sense but I seem to be in full Blevinicus: Work and Eat mode right now. I am still one month away from not being crazy busy with work and although I lost a lot of weight due to stress awhile back, the LB's are coming back because now all I do is eat and have developed a clear mind like what happened to the main character in Office Space. I sort of zone out, not to the point where I don't know what is happening, but just to the point that nothing worries me anymore. I felt very sick with stress in March and can't go back to that feeling so no matter what happens I will not get concerned over it.

I also find myself talking like they did in the Spartacus TV show. The other day I mentioned in a series of interviews that it was time for the Primus. Everyone looked at me like I had two heads. I had to explain that it meant the marquee event, the person they were all waiting to talk to was coming up next. In the show the Primus was the main event of the gladiator games and usually featured the top fighters. It would be the championship title match of Wrestlemania or the Kentucky Derby after a full day of races before it. I also refer to money as coin now like the show and refer often to things happening because of the Gods such as "the sky will open up and rain will fall if the gods have it so."

Big Ben meets Big Ben

I recently spent 10 days in Europe for my last master's class at Virginia Commonwealth University. Most people question my degree because of this class but to me it was well deserved after trying to mix in an average 50-60 hour work week with two classes per semester and all the work that went into doing well in those classes. Since so much came out of this class in Dublin, Liverpool, London and Paris I decided to break it down by categories for this blog.

Big Ben vs. Big Ben
I would like to start with the obvious highlight of the trip. Myself "Big Ben" finally met face-to-face with the famously named Big Ben in London. I feel there was mutual respect between the two. I had no idea that Big Ben was a bell and not the giant clock but the bell tolls for thee. I have tried to live down the National Lampoon's line "Look kids, Big Ben, Parliament" for quite a few years but my experience was similar. As was the case with much of the trip it was a quick view and then on to the next thing. I would have loved to spend some time there but I was just happy we got to see so many things in such a short amount of time.

Big Ben vs. Big Ben

Dublin

I was really excited about going to Dublin and drinking like an Irishman. However, the city was even better than I imagined. One of my favorite things was the cobblestone streets that went through the Temple bar district. It would not be fun to run a marathon on but lucky for me I don't like running period so I was ok. It was my first experience with traffic flowing in the opposite direction of the U.S. though. Good thing I was taught to look both ways before crossing the street because the tendency to look left first was still intact. 

Cobblestone Streets

Dublin Drinking

Now I still accomplished my goal for drinking in Dublin. However, the first night I had five beers and stumbled back to the hotel. I blame it on the jet lag and having not slept more than four hours in the previous 36 hours but it could have been that I am getting old and can't hang like I used to. After three I felt a little buzzed and started to head back to the hotel. The beers ran through me quickly and I had to stop twice at a pub along the way to use the restroom and of course get another beer. I was proud that I tried different beers every place I went the entire trip. My internal GPS did get me back to the hotel eventually and luckily my roomate, Greg, was in the lobby to help me find the room. The next night I did much better, drinking just as many beers or one or two more and not feeling buzzed at all. 

I enjoyed my Guinness

Guinness Storehouse

The coolest thing we did in Dublin was go to the Guinness Storehouse. We were pushing closing time as our previous tour ran long but managed to call ahead and have the tickets waiting for us. As we were about to go on the tour, we found out the free beers were about to close up shop as well so we skipped the tour and went for the important stuff. Greg and I were apparently the only ones who listened to the announcement that the fourth floor was learn how to pour the perfect pint and the sixth was the bar. We went and learned the tricks of the trade, gaining a certificate of excellence afterwards to go with our perfectly-poured beer. Everyone else just went and some other person pour it for them. I don't like Guinness but that is U.S. Guinness. Dublinites tell me it is the water but whatever the reason Guinness is very good in Ireland. I filled my second night with pints of Guinness in fact. One of those was free as the bar on the sixth floor was about to close and our small group talked the bartender into giving us the extra ones she had poured. She kept pouring more after as a private group came in but we didn't want to push our luck by trying a second time. This was at the Gravity Bar which had a great view from the top of the tower overlooking the city of Dublin. 

The Perfect Pour

Dublin Sports

Contrary to how this blog has started out we did do a lot related to sports. In Dublin we toured Aviva Stadium (soccer stadium), Croke Park where Gaelic Football and Hurling occur and the National Aquatic Centre. Aviva is only a few years old and was very cool. It was our first of a few experiences where we got to walk out of the tunnel to crowd noise and music to the pitch (field). At Croke Park we learned that hurling is the fastest moving sport alive and ridiculous while Gaelic Football is not to be taken lightly either. The cool thing at the National Aquatic Centre was we got to watch swimming Olympic Trials races for the tri-nations although they were slower than collegiate races in the U.S.

Aviva Stadium

Liverpool

I will be honest. I did not have high expectations for Liverpool. The only thing I knew about it was the Beatles had some connection to the city. It was the most pleasantly surprising part of my trip as I had a blast. First of all the drive there was spectacular and everything I pictured in my head about England only with a lot more sheep. Much like driving through Eastern Colorado and seeing a ton of cows in every pasture, in England it was hundreds of sheep everywhere you looked.

Holy Sheep!

Best Day Everton

The first thing we did before even going to the hotel in Liverpool was go to the English Premier League game between Everton and Fullham. This game was a lot of fun as the hometown Everton won 4-0. Six minutes in to the game they scored on a penalty kick after a player was tackled in the box. The equivalnet of 4-0 is like a 50-0 football game = beatdown. Two Americans were on the field. With a shutout performance, Everton goalie Tim Howard made us proud. Also the most exciting thing for me was watching Clint Dempsey as he looks just like my buddy Tomko. Holla Tomko! I could not zoom in enough to get a picture in focus but he is wearing pink shoes. Unfortunately Dempsey/Tomko was on the losing team. The game was so much fun our grouped came up with the slogan "Best Day Everton" which was used a lot throughout the trip. 

Best Day Everton

Michael Tomko and Clint Dempsey

Liverpooligan

The term I came up with from being in Liverpool was Liverpooligan. We all partied hard like hooligans but did not stir up any trouble (that I know of). We were staying at Albert Docks which reminded me of the Inner Harbor in Baltimore somewhat. There were several restaurants and bars to enjoy. I knew there would be some crazy stuff when the name of a bar included Freak Show in its title. Yes, I ended up there and after having several drinks I witnessed two girls in scimpy outfits grinding metal to shoot sparks all over the place. The sparks did not feel good so I got out of the way but some embraced it and danced underneath. People were dressed up like it was New Year's Eve in New York. I don't get that dressed up, well except for the ESPYs. I did not fit in but still had fun.

Albert Docks - Home of the Freak Show

Cavern Club

The best part of Liverpool for me was the Cavern Club. This is where the Beatles got their start apparently. The second day we were there was a day off but it was pouring rain. I foolishly walked to find the Cavern Club and meet up with some people. It was hard to find and my directions were poor so I ended up walking for over an hour and was drenched when I found it. I had a couple of beers at the Cavern Pub first and figured I missed the group but then went across the street to the Cavern Club. I went down three or four floors beneath street level to find a jovial group that had twice as many beers as me hanging out in a cave essentially. I had some catching up to do so I started downing beers. The music was awesome and the band played several Beatles songs. Then almost the entire class showed up and it was a great time.

Help! It was a Hard Day's Night!

Liverpool Sports

Outside of the soccer game we did not do a lot with sports in Liverpool. On our way out of town we stopped to visit the Everton Youth Academy and found out it is legal to sell nine-year olds. We also found out that the Everton players make good money because we saw the cars they drive in the parking lot as we were leaving. After that we went to Loughborough University to take a tour. It was interesting to see the different sports at a University level in Europe and we got to see some cricket players taking some whacks in essentially the equivalent of a baseball batting cage. My favorite part, however, was the Sir David Wallace building. If any of you watch The Office you get the humor in this.

Dunder Mifflin knighthood

London

I was really looking forward to going to London but was actually disappointed which was the reversal from Liverpool. Don't get me wrong I loved London and want to go back but I really was excited about touring the Olympic venues. Unfortunately construction is still going on and all we got to do was look at them from afar.

2012 Summer Olympics

Furry Hats

I was also excited about getting a picture taken with a guy in a furry hat. However, those weren't around so I settled for one with a guy in a pointy hat. I read that if you touch them they will beat the bloody hell out of you so I kept my distance. However, the changing of the horse guard was starting so he stomped his foot real hard and scared the crap out of me as I was yelled at by another guy to move away. Later on we saw the furry hats in the changing of the guard for Buckingham Palace. I was satisfied with that.

Cheer up! I am an annoying tourist.

There are the furry hats

Picadilly Circus

The final night in London was free. Some people were going to see Platform 9 3/4 from Harry Potter (we took the train from there the next day) but I couldn't decide what I wanted to do. I ended up taking the train to Picadilly Circus. It was basically like New York's Times Square and unfortunately not a real circus. Although the street lined with strip clubs and sex shops could have had some circus performer types. I avoided that street and went to a pub that was four stories or so tall and had a giant tree in the middle of it. A bartender at place I ate dinner told me about it and I ended up hanging out with a man and two gorgeous ladies from New Zealand that now live in London. Another good night.

A tree in a bar?

London Sports

Outside of the Olympics the only thing we did with sports in London was tour Wembley Stadium. This is the home of the English soccer National Team. It was nice to see the stadium and Wayne Rooney's jersey but the cool thing was that the press conference to announce the National Team head coach was taking place while our tour was going on and we went right by the room. We also got to take our picture with the FA Cup but I was too cheap to pay for the picture.

Wembley, not to be confused with Wimbledon

Paris

Paris did not get off to a great start for our entire group. We took the high speed train from London that travels around 150 mph and goes underneath the English Channel which is pretty cool but the view around the Paris train station showed a lot of graffiti and the city was very dirty. Also our hotel was not in the best location. I chose to walk around and kill a little time when we got there but I felt like I was going to get jumped for about 10 straight blocks. Three to five guys were hanging out in front of every store and would just stare at me as I walked by. It was very uncomfortable but I made it back to the hotel unscathed. When we all got on the bus to go to a soccer game I sensed everyone felt the same way I did about Paris. However, the mood quickly changed when we reached a different part of town that was a lot nicer. 

Louvre changed Paris for the better

Robert

For the first three cities we visited our bus driver's name was Robert. He was a cool dude who was very friendly and maneuvered the bus around like a geo metro. He drove with precision and quickness that impressed all of us students. When we got to France we missed Robert and the new bus drivers didn't help any. They were all rude, obnoxious, crazy drivers and smoked like freight trains. I wish Robert could have come with us to Paris. 

Montmartre

On the first free night we had in Paris, most everyone decided to go to the Eiffel Tower. I ended up going to Montmartre with the trip leaders. It is a part of the city up on top of a hill that has a view overlooking the entire city and has some quaint cafes and shops. It put me in a very good mood and I don't know if I was feeling adventurous from the area or not but I tried foods I normally would not try. We had escargot (snails) for appetizers and then I ordered frog legs for my main course. The escargot looked green and slimy but I ignored the look and they weren't bad. Same with the frog legs but the garlic butter probably helped the taste. I had seven frog legs so seven frogs had to die for my meal. Not bad for a meat and potatoes guy from the land where beef is every meal. It was a great night as we walked back down the hill past some more shops, stopping for wine at a couple of places along the way.

Seven of these guys died for my meal

Versailles

We bused about an hour from Paris to Versailles which is the royal palace of France. We only had an hour to go through it but I could have spend an entire day. A lot of the ceilings and walls were hand painted which made the inside of the palace amazing to look at. The outside was even more impressive as the gardens were at least 10 times the size of the palace and all groomed like an Alice in Wonderland maze. We did happen to hear some gun shots outside while checking out the gardens. I wish I could have taken a golf cart to see all the gardens. There were single shots and some automatic fire. Either there was a gun range nearby or they were out hunting frogs for the cafe at Montmartre. 

Paint by Number?

How does your garden grow?

Last Day

We essentially had the entire last day in Paris free. I wanted to make the most of it so I got up at 6 a.m. to go see the Statue of Liberty. When I was little I remember going to New York and we just missed the ferry to the Statue of Liberty so my mom was upset we only got to see the back of it. I have since made it back and showed her pictures of the front and now, for you Mom, here is the front of the Paris Statue of Liberty as well.

After looking at the Statue of Liberty I decided to go and climb to the top of the Eiffel Tower. It wasn't open yet so I waited an hour in line and another half hour after that to get my ticket before finally ascending to the top. I weaved through old ladies and young children at a fastened pace all the way to the top. It is a lot like the Empire State Building with a view overlooking the city. I enjoyed the view but the time it took was unfortunate as it cost me a chance to walk through the Louvre. Oh well I did what every tourist should do and that is go up the Eiffel Tower.

American tourist in the way of a great view

Official Dinner

I guess every year on this trip there is an official dinner. We had the choice of duck or salmon and I chose to try duck. It was awesome and I ended up getting it the next night at dinner as well. We also had plenty of wine as the waiters kept the glasses full. It was a great night but there is a side story that goes along with it. I was told to dress nice for the dinner but I didn't know they meant suit nice. I discovered, luckily, the day before that all the guys brought suits with them. I didn't want to look shabby so I found a suit store around the corner from our hotel. I found a great french suit for only 49 euros which is like 65 dollars probably. I was stylin for dinner that night and now own a suit from France.

Paris Sport

The sports aspect of Paris was also pretty good. We went to see Paris Saint Germain vs. Saint Etiene soccer match. The atmosphere was really good with the fans doing chants throughout. Paris Saint Germain won 2-0 and scored on a penalty kick. Who would have thought we would see a PK in both games we went to. The only downside to this game was everybody around us smoked nonstop so we probably all got the black lung.

Allez Paris-Saint-Germain !

We went to INSEP which is the home of the French Olympic training facilities. A couple of cool things happened here. We got to have lunch with a ton of Olympians. Being in the room with so many possible medalists was exciting for me. Here are the elite athletes of France and me all together. It would be like having lunch with the USA Basketball team, Michael Phelps and Justin Gatlin for example. The other cool thing was they loaned us a field for us to play our own soccer game. Not to brag but my team won 3-1. They must have known my soccer prowess as they put me at right back. I played lockdown D to help shutdown the opponents fastbreak attack on numerous occasions. Best thing was I did not pull a hamstring. The final sport activity for us was a rugby game between Paris Rugby and Racing Metro. We received a lecture from Paris Rugby the day before and they gave us flags to wave. I enjoyed watching rugby and experiencing a new sport. The greatest thing was they had a remote control car to take the tee out for kicks.

Wrap Up

This blog is probably way too long but I had such a great trip and wanted to share my experience to the five followers I have. Although there is a new stats feature with my blog and it turns out I have had over 1,000 views, including people from India, China and Russia. In fact I have quite the following in Russia. By the way Rocky > Ivan Drago. For the people in India, ignore that we eat mostly beef in rural Colorado. Now that my blog is worldwide I am glad I can write about worldly experiences.

True Love?

This morning when I got to work I was checking out some links on cnn.com. After going down the list of ones labeled North Korea about to test a nuke, a New Hampshire police chief killed, three killed in Ohio restaurant shooting, two coast guard members killed in Alaska (sensing a pattern?), I finally came across one titled "A love story made at Chick-fil-A". I really enjoy reading people's stories about falling in love but this one was a video. Apparantly there is a group of people who go around and camp out for the opening of a Chick-fil-A. Now I love chicken biscuits possibly more than anything in this world but I wouldn't camp out for one because I can get them every day. I even had two before going to work this morning.

http://www.cnn.com/video/?hpt=hp_t2#/video/us/2012/04/13/dnt-md-chick-fil-a-love-story.cnn

These two lovebirds were camping out for an opening and they kept staring at each other until finally getting up the nerve to talk. When you watch the video you will be shocked at how many Chick-fil-A openings they have gone to. This love story got me thinking about random encounters. Could it be the next time I am waiting in the checkout line at Target that I find my one and only or I could be pumping gas next to my soul mate. With my luck the perfect someone is held up in a chinese prison because of a typo on her passport.

These random encounters that could lead to 60 years or 60 days of marriage can happen anywhere I guess. Another video I watched recently courtesy of my cousin Erica (Thanks Erica!) was from a show called SoulPancake. The name of the episode was chatterbox and what they did was put a ball pit on a street corner with a sign above it saying "Take a seat and make a new friend". What a great idea! I love ball pits and I could sit in one all day. I would love to put a ball pit in my house one day. Anyway to help the process along there were questions the people could ask each other written on bigger balls in the pit. (That's what she said!).

http://cozyhunter.com/musings/chatterbox/

One of my favorite references to true love was made by Westley or the Dread Pirate Roberts in the movie Princess Bride. If you haven't seen it the movie has fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love and miracles according to the storyteller. A couple of my favorite quotes from the movie about true love are "Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while" and "His true love is marrying another tonight, so who else has the cause for ultimate suffering?"

I have always thought of my grandparents as the ultimate true love example. They have been married 65 years now and are still going strong. Well they aren't as strong as they used to be because of age but they are certainly a great example for me and my siblings. Whether we follow that example or not has been another story.

I consider myself quite the romantic, using simple things to make an impression. With my bucket full of ideas and my recent urge to write a lot I have started to write my own love story. It will quite possibly be the greatest love story of all time and I am sure once the five subscribers to this blog pass the story on to friends of theirs and they pass it on to friends of theirs it will be picked up by Random House and then made into a movie by Paramount within the month. I won't provide details yet but the story will make a lot of girls cry and Pretty Woman will no longer be their favorite movie. They will have to pull this book off the shelfs.

 

Pink Flamingo has risen

With it being Easter and knowing the true meaning of the holiday, you know hunting easter eggs to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus. Well nobody really knows how the two are connected but I have found a way to connect them through my blog.

I would like to tell a little story about the birth or rising of my Pink Flamingo. Awhile back I found a pink egg for sale with directions on how to hatch the Pink Flamingo inside. I placed the egg in some water as directed and waited for the process to begin.

The excitement of this entire process was hard to contain. I wanted my pink flamingo to be born right then and had no idea how long it would take. I bought the egg over a weekend and each day and night I hoped progress would be made. I checked it when I woke up in the morning and when I went to bed at night. After no progress the first day I decided to try and speed the process along so I incubated the egg by moving it under the floor lamp for a little while. Sure enough the next morning there was the first crack!

Worried about the late birth of the pink flamingo I thought it would be wise to get it checked out. Since the ultrasound app on my Iphone cost money I went with the free x-ray app. Everything seemed to appear 100 percent good so I was pleased. The crack slowly started to spread over the next couple of days and you could see the neck and body show through.

When the head popped out I decided it would be good to transfer the egg over to a larger container in order to give the pink flamingo more space to breathe. Not wanting to jeopardise the egg or pink flamingo in any way I used some ice cube tongs wrapped in bubble wrap to move the egg from the glass to a bowl.

A few days later the pink flamingo had emerged from the egg. I now was the very proud owner of one of the rarest species of pink flamingo.

As most of the birthing process took place in a Guiness glass I decided to name it Guiness. Here it is in its new home next to my black bear that is trying to avoid being stabbed by a japanese knife.

Now don't you see the significance of the relationship between this story and Easter.

Case of the Mondays

Remember in Office Space when the guy says "sounds like someone's got a case of the Mondays". I have heard a lot of people talk about it being Monday and them not getting the week off to a good start. Meanwhile I am as happy as a clam like this guy.

I have never really hated Mondays and let me explain my theories of why I don't think it is as bad as everyone thinks. First of all people seem to think that Monday is the start of the week. Yes there is a lot of pressure to get your week started off the right way and it is hard to do with having to go to work after the weekend but it is my belief that Monday is not the first day of the week. Stay with me here.

It makes since to me that Sunday is the first day of the week. Why do you ask? Take a look at a calendar and tell me what day of the week is on the far left .... Sunday. Doesn't it make sense that the calendar would put the first day of the week on the first column.

It makes sense because it is true. Sunday is the first day of the week based on religious reasons I don't know for sure but google it. Thus why do they consider Sunday part of the weekend? Wouldn't everyone feel better if they knew each week started and ended with a day off. What a better way to start your week then watching football or lying around on your couch watching movies. You never hear "sounds like someone's got a case of the Sundays".

Of course for us in college athletics sometimes you go months without a day off so it is really just one very long week. Even still I don't mind Mondays. I don't really even have a favortite day of the week although I mostly think of any day off as my favorite day. For some reason though I felt like I needed to write about it because so many people complained about it being Monday. I am trying to be happy and joyful at all times now so for me it is just another great second day of the week.

Closer to my green jacket

I found out today that I am that much closer to obtaining my Master's degree in Education from VCU as I passed my comprehensive exam I took in December. Now for winning the Master's don't you get a green jacket?

Green jacket, gold jacket, who gives a shit? I now only have to pass my last two classes and that degree is mine. I will have paid something like $15,000 for a sweet piece of paper that will go in the back of my closet with my other two multi-thousand dollar pieces of paper. The bright side is I will not get any more money at work and won't get promoted. So I have that going for me. My dad did tell me I would get my picture in the paper so to the town of Hugo - look forward to that.

As for passing my final two classes - it shouldn't be a problem. This spring I have a sports business class with an awesome professor. I took a class with him last year and he was great. I have a book review and a couple of open book, open notes exams so I should pass that with the flying colors of the rainbow ... you know ROY G BIV. That is made in the shade because my grandpa's name is Roy so mark it down. My other class is a two-week trip to Europe. If they give credit for how many beers I can drink in Dublin I will easily pass. If not then I should get an "A" because we are going to London for a celebrity death match between Big Ben the clock and Big Ben the red, white and blue American. Team USA always wins just like you will see again in August in the London Olympics. I might even take my shirt off, carry my 2x4 and chant USA, USA just like one of my heroes Hacksaw Jim Duggan. Paris could be my downfall although I do like french toast and french fries so if they have those I will do alright. 

Things are looking up in the world of this Big Ben. I am closer to finishing school and two buddies from High School visited last weekend to provide a lot of fun and entertainment for me to help 2012 kick off the right way.

Quite the Morning

Today started out just like any other Monday normally does. For most people it is the start of the week but for us in college athletics it is just the continuation of one really long week that seems like it starts in August and ends in June.

However, this Monday I was excited. In relation to last week's blog today was the day to get rid of my cable. The Broncos lost on Saturday, well lost puts it lightly, more like got Tom Brady and Gronkowski laid for the next week with some Boston jersey chasers. After getting ready for work I packed up the cable box and never looked back as I headed off to work.

Here is where my day became a lot more interesting. First of all it was raining slightly but as I have learned in a few months, people in Austin drive crazy when it rains like people in North Carolina do when it lightly snows. There is something that makes these people think they will wreck with the tiniest bit of moisture on the ground. Right as I go to turn on I-35 (AKA the parking lot), of course there is a wreck being cleared on the on ramp. So even with an empty lane to go around this everyone slams on their breaks and fish tail around a little.

I luckily hit the eye of the storm in morning traffic so I thought and easily cruised at 45 mph past where I normally turn off for work. I decided to drop the cable box off first thing and be done with it. Now I knew where the place was at but Austin loves its frontage roads, one-way exits and streets and divided interstates so getting there was less than easy. For some reason the interstate splits into a high/low divided interstate with some exits off the high and some off the low. My experience with the frontage roads have made me learn to get off two exits early because they are one way and you end up circling around two or three times to try and get to the other side of the interstate.

Today it didn't matter I took the low I-35 and the exit I needed was still off the high one. I went down the frontage road and tried to do a u-turn but it was a one-way street so I couldn't even turn around. I was forced to get back on I-35 and go to the next exit about four miles away. This put me on the frontage road again and another mile or two down I finally got to u-turn. I got off on the 51st street exit and decided to take the frontage road to 41st where Time Warner's office is. However, the exit just went to 51st street and not to the frontage road. Thus I turned on 51st and then made a left on Airport to try and take that road. This took me right back to I-35 so I got back on hoping the next exit is what I needed. It was but that would have been on the lower I-35 and I was on the higher so I ended up going all the way back towards my work exit. I went to get off but construction cones blocked the exit so I had to go a couple of miles down to the next exit and take the frontage road past the capital into downtown, circle around and head back towards work.

It was smooth sailing from there to Time Warner but I was cursing the entire time, flipping off every building and street in Austin and yelling at a few idiots for driving stupid because they couldn't wait to talk to their BFF on their cell phone until five minutes later when they weren't driving. I pull in to the parking lot, grab the cable box, get out, walk to the door and there it is. A sign reading "We will be closed January 16 for Martin Luther King Day"

My reply, "F*cking F*ck, chicken beaters". Yes I need to work on my language but Austin has that effect on me. But c'mon really.

Well after that I just counted my losses and headed back to work. Of course one lane was closed going back for no apparenet reason other than some jackass decided to put 100 orange cones in the middle of one of the lanes. With it for sure being a day campus would be closed and nobody with a life would be working at least I could park in the upper administration's parking spaces. I went past the street where I usually park to go there but sure enough the road was closed and there were probably 5,000 people with banners and crap walking towards me in some stupid parade.

I am now in my office for what will be about 30 minutes before I give up on this day. No matter how much work I have to do it can wait because I am afraid of what will happen next if I don't go home.